4 Tips To Help You Overcome Your Child's Failures

Catching up with other mates in the industry is always great! However, a recent conversation struck a chord.

I couldn’t help but feel for other sporting parent’s and their kids in similar situations… So, I thought I’d share.

Let’s call my mate Bazz for the purpose of this post. Why? Well with everything going on about Karen these days who doesn’t love an Aussie battler blokes name either! ;)

What was it about? Bazz’s child had failed to make the cut and be in the desirable team. As if Covid-19 wasn’t a big enough challenge for our youth but throw in there not making the team with such a reduced competition schedule… this would be shattering for them.

Here’s the irony. Bazz is a quality strength and conditioning coach. With decades of experience in the development space and achieved a decent level of competition in his day in this particular sport too. If anyone was in a good position to set his child up for success, Bazz would be the go.

In this instance unfortunately for Bazz’s son, he’s simply a late developer. Throw in contact sport, and it becomes more evident.

We can all sing kum bah yah about the process, what good development programs involve, and how it’s all about nurturing the individual. But reality is many coaches who work in the development space more often than not it is their secondary/ supplementary gig. And you know what? Bragging rights at the pub over a few schooeys still carries weight.

Throw a limited competition schedule and another premiership for the belt- you guessed it. You're still the big dawg in town mate because you as the coach had it all stacked against you and still produced a premiership winning team. Scoff scoff…

It’s simple. Bazz’s kid simply wasn’t selected because he wasn’t big enough. I knew it straight away. Bazz acknowledged it too. Unfortunately his son had to wear the consequences.

What I loved about Bazz was his response of how he handled it. As a sporting parent I’m sure at some stage you’ve experienced something similar. If you haven’t, you’re about to. Here’s a few important take away's courtesy of big bad Bazz:

1. He didn’t approach the coach with his opinion. Simply accepted the premiership winning coaches rationale.

2. Encouraged his child to continue to work on his game. Because he hadn’t failed. Better yet he jumped in with him (as he always has).

3. Continued to drop him off at his weekend fixture. Note I did say drop him off. Not hide in the bushes trying to watch when it’s been clearly stated in the notifications to parent’s fixtures are ‘spectator free’.

4. Lastly, tackled (all pun intended) the beauty of his child’s late development with him because good sporting parents know that late developers actually have greater longevity in sport and likelihood of success over their earlier maturing peers. Switching what could be perceived as a negative for his son to a positive.

Albeit simple, you'd be surprised how frequently alternative options are sort from other parent's.

These 4 tips will not only help your child accept their current circumstances, but set them up to win later in life!

If you would like to gain further insights with free resources, please join our fb group. If you could relate to this experience or know another sporting parent who is experiencing a similar issue, I’d love for you to share it!

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